Trav's Christmas Message to the Commonwealth 2007

Monday, December 17, 2007 at 08:12PM
Posted by Registered CommenterTrav in

Click the image below to get my 2007 Christmas video.

 

Peace and love to all.

Last year's message is here and here are some out-takes: 1 and 2

Pet Humans sacked, candidates please apply.

Sunday, October 28, 2007 at 11:41AM
Posted by Registered CommenterTrav in

I'm saddened to report that I have had to sack Mr and Mrs Pet Human. Mrs Pet Human is now malingering with a bad cough and never was so much phlegm created by one person.  At the same time Virgin Media have 'upgraded' Mr and Mrs Pet Humans with TV which doesn't work and broadband which stopped working for five days, disrupting my greetings card business. Although Mr Pet Human has been ringing helplines all week using his finest fair yet exasperated tone, I'm not convinced that my needs are being catered for or managed properly in the interim.

Candidates for Pet Human please apply, stating your credentials. The salary is five quinces a week.

Travelted Inc is an equal opportunities employer for buxom blonde masseuses who can make quince jelly.

 

 

On the mend

Sunday, September 30, 2007 at 02:21PM
Posted by Registered CommenterTrav in

Mr Pet Human is now in his recovery position, Buddha like, while Ms Pet Human caters for his every whim. Since there are three world cups going on (Rugby, Womens Football and Cricket 20-20), the timing is very suspicious indeed. Mr Pet Human has also discovered that stairs, crutches and glasses of wine are not a good combination.

Mrs Pet Human has taken to her role very well. Yesterday she bought Mr Pet Human a stool so that he can keep himself occupied ... with the washing up. Tee Hee.

 

 

 

 

Friday Morning Update

Friday, September 28, 2007 at 10:09AM
Posted by Registered CommenterTrav in

I have just spoken to Mr Pet Human on the phone.  He is alive.  He still has 2 legs, although one of them doesn't work, and he has a sore throat and swollen mouth as a result of muchly puking after his operation yesterday.  Thank you to everyone who has been ringing and emailing - and for Auntie Julie's extremely helpful comments about personal hygiene and caring for the sick.  Mrs Pet Human has been extremely stoical all week and is now beginning to feel a little queasy. (For those of you who don't know her - whenever she visits the sick she usually ends up on a trolley in a side room....her self control has been admirable this week!)

Things were a little tense yesterday evening as Mr PH was taken down to theatre at 4:30 and didn't re-materialise on the ward until 9:30.  I told Mrs PH he was ok, but she watches far too much Holby City for her own good and was convinced he was lying on a slab somewhere.  I too have now ruptured my Achilles Tendon and have a very smart cast on my leg - I shall show you a picture when I have time.  Mr Pet Human refused to keep me on the ward with him as he said I was filthy and would probably give him a nasty infection. (Charming.)

His parting words of love were,  "I want to stuff my face with panninis," so he has obviously recovered from the puking session.

I am now heading into Cambridge with Mrs PH as she has to go to work.  I am sure we will then spend hours sitting in the Waitrose café eating soup, and in the Trumpington Park and Ride car park waiting for the call that says "Come and pick me up."

As Evelyn Waugh once wrote,  "Let's get really drunk tonight, Charles!"

 

Update

Thursday, September 27, 2007 at 11:11AM
Posted by Registered CommenterTrav in

Still in hospital.  Still Nil By Mouth.....although it now looks as though the operation will take place on Friday and not today. Dying of thirst in the mean time while a decision is made.  Full cast has been removed and replaced with a below the knee job.  Much more mobile.